My mind can be a dark place most days. Right when I wake up to start a new day, my mind is already on overdrive with the worst things that could happen during the day. There could be a tornado, a family member could die, my boyfriend could end up in the hospital, my car could break down, my puppy could get seriously ill and many more. I don’t understand how these negative start.
I always do everything I can to stay positive. One of the biggest things I do is I stay away from the news. A majority of the things you read and hear in the news is negative. It is good to know what is happening in our world but it can be too much. Why can’t there be more positive news? I am guessing it’s because people care more about the bad things that are happening. Bad news has a greater effect on our lives.
I read a fact recently that said that we have between 12,000 to 60,000 thoughts per day. Our minds are overwhelmingly busy. As much as 98% of those thoughts are the same thoughts you had the day before. I didn’t realise this until I started paying more attention to my thoughts. All of my negative thoughts are exactly the same. All the things I say I will do everyday are the same.
A fact I found even more interesting was that 80% of our thoughts are negative. Anxiety and depression are mental illness that caused by having continuous negative thoughts. This is why making a complete lifetime recover from mental illness is so difficult.
Negative thoughts I have been having lately are:
I am not a good enough writer.
I will never make a career out of writing.
I will never find an internship to finish my degree.
I don’t have the drive to chase my dreams.
I am worthless.
I am better off alone.
My boyfriend doesn’t love me the same anymore.
From somebody who doesn’t have the control to accept and change their thoughts are going to have a harder time thinking positive. It is even harder when the thoughts from the day before start coming back. How do you find the strength to stay on a path of positive thinking and not let the negative thoughts control you?
It is said that it takes 21 days to break a habit. That can seem like a long time when you are trying to change negative thoughts but it is possible. You just need to remember that you are stronger than your mind because you control it.
One of the best know ways to gain control over negative thoughts is to accept them. It can be hard if the only way you know how to accept them is accepting them as being who you are. You need to learn to accept them as only being there in your mind for a short period of time and leaving as if they never existed.
I like to use the cloud or river effect for this. I close my eyes and see the negative thoughts floating through my head. I recognize them and pay attention to them until I can no longer see them. They are no longer in my mind so they are no longer a part of me.
This works great if you like visuals and like meditation.
Another great tip that works is changing your thoughts to positive ones. This is great when it comes to changing a habit. If you do this daily, within a few weeks it will become natural and you may not notice you’re doing it.
If the first thing you do when you wake up is remind yourself of everything you need to or forgot to and beat yourself up for it, just think of it as being a productive day. Think about the positive outcome of what you need to get done is. If you worry that your friends don’t want to hear what you have to say, think about how your comment will be interesting and will help keep the conversation lasting longer. They wanted to have a conversation with you because you are interesting.
The reason behind having so many negative thoughts is because it protects us. It is our minds fight or flight response. We wouldn’t be able to understand if a situation is good or bad if without negative thoughts. We need negative thoughts to know a situation is safe for us.
Do you think the statistic is accurate? Are most of your thoughts negative? Have you been able to break the habit of letting your negative thoughts control you?